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The Straitjacket of Perfectionism

The Straitjacket of Perfectionism
Author: John Connor
Publisher: Shannon Publishing LLC
Total Pages:
Release: 2017-01-28
Genre:
ISBN: 9780998595825

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Do you start projects that are important to you, but then abandon them? It is likely unrecognized perfectionism that is holding you back from creating art, starting your new business, writing your book, or growing spiritually. You have big dreams that you keep secret, because you don't want to be embarrassed if you fail at them. Great news! This book is for you. I will help shake you free of your procrastination paralysis, calm your inner critic into silence, and open you to become what your soul desires. You will recognize and confront your fear of making mistakes and release the creativity-killing -- but deeply held -- belief that you can't go for your goals because of the risk of not doing it "just exactly right." How? Well, I've done it. Personality profile tests showed me very high on perfectionism, and I didn't even realize it. But then I "got it" -- I understood that this unhelpful internal drive to only do things I could do easily actually stunts my willingness to work on my biggest dreams. Outside of things like math tests, "Perfect" is mostly a myth. Yet it isn't even just that. You expect to make no mistakes -- or only just a few -- on your way to doing difficult tasks: learning the piano, writing a business plan, parenting, or creating the next hit Broadway play. Cindy Wigglesworth, author, says "Well written and entertaining, this book is full of helpful advice. I recognized myself in some of the stories - and I bet you will too! Don't waste time criticizing yourself. Use your time instead reading this book and trying the tips within it!" One such tip is looking at the "Critical Voice" as opposed to the "Creative Voice." And by "Critical" in this sense, I mean "analytical." A giant step we can take out of perfectionism is to distinguish between these two abilities, and when to use them. For example, all of us are music critics. We know what we like, we know what sounds good, we know what is boring. We don't always agree exactly on those, but we know the difference between a song by The Beatles, and something done in a garage by four guys who don't know what they're doing. But what about you? What about when YOU want to write a song? You have a lifetime of critical evaluation of music. But writing it? You are just starting out. And -- surprise! -- when you are just starting at something, you suck at it. Perfectionists, though, expect to be very good at things, very quickly. And so you quit writing songs, because your critical ability to know how good a song is, is FAR more developed than your ability to actually write a good song. See what I mean? "I have lived a creative life as a singer songwriter for over fifty years. Yet, locked away inside my perfectionist heart is a restrained longing to paint and to write books. I give thanks to John Connor for his insightful and illuminating book The Straightjacket of Perfectionism - he has provided me a key to free my creative soul. I recommend this book to stymied perfectionists everywhere." - Dana Cooper Singer-Songwriter Even people who know how to write a good song -- and Dana Cooper was written many good songs -- have areas in which their perfectionism trips them up. So get The Straitjacket of Perfectionism, and come with me to get free of the trap of 'perfect', and open up to progress -- taking steps and then really taking leaps -- toward your greatest goals.


Released from Shame

Released from Shame
Author: Sandra D. Wilson
Publisher: InterVarsity Press
Total Pages: 201
Release: 2009-09-20
Genre: Religion
ISBN: 0830876723

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Do you feel that your problem is not what you do but who you are? caught in patterns of destructive relationships? that you never get enough affirmation? afraid you'll pass bad patterns along to your children? that God probably loves you less than others? If these questions fit you, you may be experiencing shame. Often shame comes from being raised in a family that has an impaired ability to provide its members with healthy nurturing. As a result, you carry emotional scars into adult life, longing for happiness but feeling unworthy of it. Sandra Wilson knows much about "shame-based" families--both from personal experience and from her years as a family therapist. Drawing from this background, she teaches you biblical principles that have helped her and many others work through painful issues and learn new, healthier ways to live. In this revised edition, Wilson also includes help for parents who want to break the intergenerational cycle of shame and give their children a "grace-based" foundation for life.


Perfectionist Turn

Perfectionist Turn
Author: Den Uyl Douglas Den Uyl
Publisher: Edinburgh University Press
Total Pages: 348
Release: 2016-04-14
Genre: Philosophy
ISBN: 1474413358

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Contemporary political philosophy - especially in the works of Martha Nussbaum, John Rawls and Amartya Sen - has assumed that it can separate itself off from other philosophical positions and frameworks. In this book, Den Uyl and Rasmussen challenge this trend by moving from the liberalism they advocate in their earlier work to what they call 'individualistic perfectionism' in ethics. They continue to challenge the assumption that a neo-Aristotelian ethical framework cannot support a liberal, non-perfectionist political theory by filling in the nature of the perfectionist ethical approach utilised in their previous political theorising. By developing the central features and principles of individualistic perfectionism they show that it is a major and powerful alternative to much contemporary ethical thinking - particularly to constructivism - and that it is capable of overcoming standard objections to perfectionism.


The Rainbow Way

The Rainbow Way
Author: Lucy H. Pearce
Publisher: John Hunt Publishing
Total Pages: 356
Release: 2013-12-13
Genre: Crafts & Hobbies
ISBN: 1782790276

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Visioned as the guide and mentor that most creative women yearn for, but never find in their daily lives, The Rainbow Way explores the depths of the creative urge, from psychological, biological, spiritual and cultural perspectives. This positive, nurturing and practical book will help to empower you to unlock your creative potential within the constraints of your demanding life as a mother. Featuring the wisdom of over fifty creative mothers: artists, writers, film-makers, performers and crafters, including: Jennifer Louden (multiple best-selling author), Pam England (author, artist and founder Birthing From Within), Julie Daley (writer, photographer, dancer and creator of Unabashedly Female), Indigo Bacal (founder of WILDE Tribe). Foreword by Leonie Dawson (author, artist, entrepreneur and women’s business and creativity mentor). ,


Making Peace with Your Past

Making Peace with Your Past
Author: H. Norman Wright
Publisher: Baker Books
Total Pages: 177
Release: 1997-11-01
Genre: Religion
ISBN: 1585582573

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Much of who we are, what we do, and how we feel is determined by our past. Whether they're relationships from our childhood or pressures from recent years, the events of the past can have a significant impact on our current behavior. A continual bestseller now re-launched with a new look for new readers, this insightful and perceptive book shows readers how to face and move beyond the negative events and feelings of their past. Writing from a compassionate, Christian perspective, H. Norman Wright helps readers understand who they are, who is responsible for their character, and how they can let go of the things of the past in order to live with confidence and enthusiasm.


Straight Jacket

Straight Jacket
Author: Matthew Todd
Publisher: Random House
Total Pages: 445
Release: 2016-06-16
Genre: Self-Help
ISBN: 1448111102

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'This is an essential read for every gay person on the planet' - Elton John 'A really brilliant and moving read for everybody, especially LGBTQI+ people' - Olly Alexander, star of It's A Sin Straight Jacket is a revolutionary clarion call for gay men, the wider LGBT community, their friends and family. Part memoir, part ground-breaking polemic, it looks beneath the shiny facade of contemporary gay culture and asks if gay people are as happy as they could be - and if not, why not? Meticulously researched, courageous and life-affirming, Straight Jacket offers invaluable practical advice on how to overcome a range of difficult issues. It also recognizes that this is a watershed moment, a piercing wake-up-call-to-arms for the gay and wider community to acknowledge the importance of supporting all young people - and helping older people to transform their experience and finally get the lives they really want. WINNER BOYZ BEST LGBT BOOK 2017 SHORTLISTED FOR THE POLARI BOOK PRIZE 2017 'Insightful, inclusive, clever and engaging' - Jeremy Langmead 'Utterly brilliant' - The Guardian


Joy Hunter

Joy Hunter
Author: Alexis Jones
Publisher: Harmony
Total Pages: 199
Release: 2023-06-13
Genre: Biography & Autobiography
ISBN: 0593578074

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A timely, colorful, and cinematic memoir chronicling one woman’s journey to rediscover her own power, resilience, and happiness “Joy Hunter gives us all permission to be human and invites us to radically love ourselves for exactly who we are.”—KRISTEN BELL I took a bone-deep breath as we drove away from my state, my city, my street, and my house, escaping my life and leaving behind all my broken parts. With a successful speaking career putting her on the road 250 days a year, a slew of prestigious awards for her activism, the hugely successful book I Am That Girl, and a happy marriage, Alexis Jones was living a seemingly charmed life. But the principles of self-care, setting boundaries, and eschewing perfectionism that she espoused in her talks didn’t seem to translate into her own life; she still never seemed to feel “enough” inside. Then, in a matter of months, things started to fall apart on the outside, too: She discovered that the man she’d always called dad was not her biological father, she had a devastating miscarriage, and the pandemic sidelined her travel schedule—and paycheck. A self-described “productivity junkie,” she was forced to slow down for the first time in her life. Hoping that time away would be a good distraction from all the chaos and heartbreak, Alexis rented an RV and set out for the open road to explore the rugged American west with her husband and their best friend. For her, the trip was both healing and disruptive. In the presence of nature’s majesty, she re-learned the art of sitting still and surrendering to the unknowable; along treacherous hiking trails she wrestled with her self-doubt and fear of failure; and through profound conversations with friends old and new, she reconnected to the power of sisterhood and began to rebelliously reconsider her priorities and ambitions—for herself and whatever shape her family might take going forward. A soulful memoir of seeking and finding, Joy Hunter traces Alexis’s quest to reclaim her voice and find wholeness within. Along the way she discovers that there is always purpose to our pain and that happiness is not something that can simply be checked off a list. Joy, it turns out, is not a destination; it’s a way of life.


Solitude

Solitude
Author: Robert Kull
Publisher: New World Library
Total Pages: 388
Release: 2010-10-05
Genre: Nature
ISBN: 1577317726

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Years after losing his lower right leg in a motorcycle crash, Robert Kull traveled to a remote island in Patagonia's coastal wilderness with equipment and supplies to live alone for a year. He sought to explore the effects of deep solitude on the body and mind and to find the spiritual answers he'd been seeking all his life. With only a cat and his thoughts as companions, he wrestled with inner storms while the wild forces of nature raged around him. The physical challenges were immense, but the struggles of mind and spirit pushed him even further. Solitude: Seeking Wisdom in Extremes is the diary of Kull's tumultuous year. Chronicling a life distilled to its essence, Solitude is also a philosophical meditation on the tensions between nature and technology, isolation and society. With humor and brutal honesty, Kull explores the pain and longing we typically avoid in our frantically busy lives as well as the peace and wonder that arise once we strip away our distractions. He describes the enormous Patagonia wilderness with poetic attention, transporting the reader directly into both his inner and outer experiences.


The Parent Gap

The Parent Gap
Author: Randi Rubenstein
Publisher: Morgan James Publishing
Total Pages: 107
Release: 2017-08-01
Genre: Family & Relationships
ISBN: 1683503066

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Bridge the gap between how you thought you’d parent and how you’re actually parenting now with the tools and inspiration found in this supportive guide. You swore you were going to raise your kids differently . . . so why are your parents’ words coming out of your mouth? We all want happiness and success for our children throughout their lives. The worry of screwing up the people you love the most is attached to the thought that your behavior will possibly hinder their future state of being. You want the world for them. The Parent Gap shows how to change the patterns from your own childhood you intended to bury—allowing you to access in the heat of the moment that file in your brain with all those parenting tools you took the time to learn. As you close the parenting gap, you will be able to show up as the level-headed adult you truly want to be in your life and especially with your kids. Your confidence and clarity will shine brightly on the fact that you will be sending them off into the world with a rock solid foundation. Using real life stories and practical depictions, The Parent Gap combines the teachings of Dr. Shefali Tsabary, Brené Brown, and Martha Beck with a real-life, down-in-the-trenches parent perspective to create a fun and insightful read.


Never Good Enough - Escaping The Prison Of Perfectionism

Never Good Enough - Escaping The Prison Of Perfectionism
Author: Kelly Wallace
Publisher: Intuitive Living
Total Pages: 65
Release: 2021-02-22
Genre: Self-Help
ISBN:

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There are two sides to just about everything in life and perfectionism isn't any different. Most perfectionists care so much about the things that are important to them and care about how they do these things. We want our projects, our homes, relationships, and lives to be the best they can be. If we use our time wisely we can bring into reality—through effort or ingenuity—all of the potential we envision. Okay, so we tend to be tough on ourselves. We're often filled with stress and anxiety. We can procrastinate, big-time. And far too often we feel we've fallen short of our idealized goals. This hyper-focus keeps us staring closely at everything we believe is wrong rather than seeing what's right. This is especially true when it comes to our self-perception where we measure our accomplishments, our looks, finances, education, career, or anything else against others. And, for most perfectionists, we find that we need to do better. We should do better. We must do better! We become over-achievers and over-thinkers and over-controlling and lose all sense of flexibility and happiness. Life soon becomes a strait-jacket we can never free ourselves from. I want to show you how to recognize when your perfectionism is hurting you and your relationships then rein it in. You want to get your perfectionism to work for you rather than against you, and by getting it to take a backseat at times, you'll find that you're more productive, there's more time in your days, you feel more relaxed, more comfortable, and a whole lot happier.