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The Onion Presents A Book of Jean's Own!

The Onion Presents A Book of Jean's Own!
Author: Jean Teasdale
Publisher: St. Martin's Griffin
Total Pages: 272
Release: 2010-10-12
Genre: Humor
ISBN: 1429951826

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A few words from the author and eponymous columnist behind The Onion's column, "A Room of Jean's Own," Jean Teasdale: Hi Jeanketeers and Jeanketeers-to-be!! As The Onion's very own Humor and Human-Interest columnist, I've been entertaining readers for 15 years with kooky tales of life with my hubby and our two feline children. Now for the first time, li'l ol' me shines front-and-center in a book of my very own! A Book of Jean's Own! features all-original, never-before-published material, and if that wasn't impressive enough, marks the very first Onion book by a solo writer! Historical, huh? My book is sure to find an eager audience among The Onion's ten-million-strong readership. Wait, ten million people? I had no idea! Frankly, that scares me a little. We're not in Kansas anymore, Toto! (Oh shoot, I should have put that hilarious phrase in my book!) A Book of Jean's Own! also marks a departure from past Onion books in that it isn't crammed with headlines and articles in teeny-weeny print! Instead, I write about the stuff that really matters: shopping, chocolate, part-time jobs, and hot Hollywood hunks! Whether you read my book on the bus, the beach, or the toilet, you're guaranteed to find something to chuckle at and deeply relate to! Among the many nuggets of fun: * I tell you the Twenty Things That Are Better Than Sex! * For the first time ever, you learn my maiden name! * I spill the secrets of my scrumptious chocolate-loaded desserts, such as Ooey Gooey Choco-Cocoa-Mocha Cupcakes With Raspberry Filling And Coconut-Cream Cheese-Cola Frosting! * Acquire valuable, real-world tips on coping with a job you dislike, getting through those rough teenage years, and styling a Jean hairdo of your very own! * Get a giggle out of my doodles and overdose on the words of wisdom that are my Jean Proverbs! * You've heard of pity parties—get my tips for throwing your very own self-pity party! * Check out my own cure for the blues, the Plush Jamboree! * Witness my nervous breakdown while writing this book (well, writing is hard, after all!) * Also for the first time ever, Hubby Rick speaks! (Spoiler: It's not entirely in grunts!) * Lots of exclamation points! (And phrases in parentheses!) I'm sure every single one of those ten million readers will buy my book! And who knows? They just may find something in it that will help them lead happier and better lives!


The Onion Presents Homeland Insecurity

The Onion Presents Homeland Insecurity
Author: Scott Dikkers
Publisher: Random House Digital, Inc.
Total Pages: 322
Release: 2006
Genre: American wit and humor
ISBN: 030733984X

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Hot off the reprint presses! Onion fans hear this! Homeland Insecurity is the largest collection of award-winning journalism from America's Finest News Source ever released, and that means you must buy it! Featuring every brilliantly biting article printed in The Onion between November 2004 and December 2005, a time in our country's history ripe for further examination by America's Finest News Source, Homeland Insecurity collects all the news reporting you were too lazy to read when it first appeared, now delivered in a handy single volume that will fit perfectly on the bookshelf of your dorm, ward, or cell. Homeland Insecurity is Volume 17 in the always bestselling and always entertaining Onion series. The Onion is the world's most popular humor publication, with more than 3.8 million weekly visitors to its website (theonion.com) and a print circulation of more than 500,000. More than a million copies of its various books have been sold to date, beginning with Our Dumb Century, which was a #1 New York Times bestseller and winner of the Thurber Prize for American Humor.


Midnight Sun

Midnight Sun
Author: Stephenie Meyer
Publisher: Little, Brown Books for Young Readers
Total Pages: 727
Release: 2020-08-04
Genre: Young Adult Fiction
ISBN: 0316592250

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#1 bestselling author Stephenie Meyer makes a triumphant return to the world of Twilight with this highly anticipated companion: the iconic love story of Bella and Edward told from the vampire's point of view. When Edward Cullen and Bella Swan met in Twilight, an iconic love story was born. But until now, fans have heard only Bella's side of the story. At last, readers can experience Edward's version in the long-awaited companion novel, Midnight Sun. This unforgettable tale as told through Edward's eyes takes on a new and decidedly dark twist. Meeting Bella is both the most unnerving and intriguing event he has experienced in all his years as a vampire. As we learn more fascinating details about Edward's past and the complexity of his inner thoughts, we understand why this is the defining struggle of his life. How can he justify following his heart if it means leading Bella into danger? In Midnight Sun, Stephenie Meyer transports us back to a world that has captivated millions of readers and brings us an epic novel about the profound pleasures and devastating consequences of immortal love. An instant #1 New York Times BestsellerAn instant #1 USA Today BestsellerAn instant #1 Wall Street Journal BestsellerAn instant #1 IndieBound BestsellerApple Audiobook August Must-Listens Pick "People do not want to just read Meyer's books; they want to climb inside them and live there." -- Time "A literary phenomenon." -- New York Times


The Onion Book of Known Knowledge

The Onion Book of Known Knowledge
Author: The Onion
Publisher: Little, Brown
Total Pages: 259
Release: 2012-10-23
Genre: Humor
ISBN: 031613323X

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Are you a witless cretin with no reason to live? Would you like to know more about every piece of knowledge ever? Do you have cash? Then congratulations, because just in time for the death of the print industry as we know it comes the final book ever published, and the only one you will ever need: The Onion's compendium of all things known. Replete with an astonishing assemblage of facts, illustrations, maps, charts, threats, blood, and additional fees to edify even the most simple-minded book-buyer, The Onion Book of Known Knowledge is packed with valuable information -- such as the life stages of an Aunt; places to kill one's self in Utica, New York; and the dimensions of a female bucket, or "pail." With hundreds of entries for all 27 letters of the alphabet, The Onion Book of Known Knowledge must be purchased immediately to avoid the sting of eternal ignorance.


The Onion Girl

The Onion Girl
Author: Charles de Lint
Publisher: Macmillan
Total Pages: 512
Release: 2002-08-03
Genre: Fiction
ISBN: 9780765303813

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Charles de Lint's stunning new novel of magic and danger in the modern world.


Class

Class
Author: Paul Fussell
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
Total Pages: 212
Release: 1992
Genre: Social Science
ISBN: 0671792253

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This book describes the living-room artifacts, clothing styles, and intellectual proclivities of American classes from top to bottom.


Atlanta

Atlanta
Author:
Publisher:
Total Pages: 248
Release: 2003-12
Genre:
ISBN:

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Atlanta magazine’s editorial mission is to engage our community through provocative writing, authoritative reporting, and superlative design that illuminate the people, the issues, the trends, and the events that define our city. The magazine informs, challenges, and entertains our readers each month while helping them make intelligent choices, not only about what they do and where they go, but what they think about matters of importance to the community and the region. Atlanta magazine’s editorial mission is to engage our community through provocative writing, authoritative reporting, and superlative design that illuminate the people, the issues, the trends, and the events that define our city. The magazine informs, challenges, and entertains our readers each month while helping them make intelligent choices, not only about what they do and where they go, but what they think about matters of importance to the community and the region.


Second Language Learning and Language Teaching

Second Language Learning and Language Teaching
Author: Vivian Cook
Publisher: Routledge
Total Pages: 393
Release: 2016-05-05
Genre: Language Arts & Disciplines
ISBN: 1134683294

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Second Language Learning and Language Teaching provides an introduction to the application of second language acquisition research to language teaching. Assuming no previous background in second language acquisition or language teaching methods, this text starts by introducing readers to the basic issues of second language acquisition research. It then examines how people learn particular aspects of the second language, such as grammar, vocabulary, pronunciation and the writing system, and at the strategies they adopt in their learning and the differences between individuals. Final chapters look at second language learning in a broader context – the goals of language teaching and how teaching methods relate to SLA research. This newly updated fifth edition builds on the comprehensive scope of earlier editions while also addressing more recent developments in the field, particularly multilingual approaches to language teaching.


What Do We Need Men For?

What Do We Need Men For?
Author: E. Jean Carroll
Publisher: St. Martin's Press
Total Pages: 256
Release: 2019-07-02
Genre: Biography & Autobiography
ISBN: 1250215447

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As seen on the cover of New York Magazine, America's longest running advice columnist goes on the road to speak to women about hideous men and whether we need them. "Carroll's lively prose careens in constant pursuit of pleasure...indefatigably funny and full of life." –Lindsay Zoladz, The Ringer “Darkly humorous and deadly serious.” –Sibbie O'Sullivan, Washington Post “A compulsively interesting feminist memoir.” –Virginia Heffernan, Slate "Somehow hilarious, in the way that only E. Jean could have written it" –Leigh Haber, Oprah Magazine “Roving, curious, compassionate, whimsical.” –Megan Garber, The Atlantic When E. Jean Carroll—possibly the liveliest woman in the world and author of the “Ask E. Jean” advice column in Elle Magazine, realized that her eight million readers and question-writers all seemed to have one thing in common—problems caused by men—she hit the road. Crisscrossing the country with her blue-haired poodle, Lewis Carroll, E. Jean stopped in every town named after a woman between Eden, Vermont and Tallulah, Louisiana to ask women the crucial question: What Do We Need Men For? E. Jean gave her rollicking road trip a sly, stylish turn when she deepened the story, creating a list called “The Most Hideous Men of My Life,” and began to reflect on her own sometimes very dark history with the opposite sex. What advice would she have given to her past selves—as Miss Cheerleader USA and Miss Indiana University? Or as the fearless journalist, television host, and eventual advice columnist she became? E. Jean intertwines the stories of the fascinating people she meets on her road trip with her “horrible history with the male sex” (including mafia bosses, media titans, boyfriends, husbands, a serial killer, and a president), creating a decidedly dark yet hopeful, hilarious, and thrilling narrative. Her answer to the question What Do We Need Men For? will shock men and delight women.


Indianapolis Monthly

Indianapolis Monthly
Author:
Publisher:
Total Pages: 256
Release: 2003-12
Genre:
ISBN:

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Indianapolis Monthly is the Circle City’s essential chronicle and guide, an indispensable authority on what’s new and what’s news. Through coverage of politics, crime, dining, style, business, sports, and arts and entertainment, each issue offers compelling narrative stories and lively, urbane coverage of Indy’s cultural landscape.