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Jealousy and Compersion in Close Relationships

Jealousy and Compersion in Close Relationships
Author: Ulrike Duma
Publisher: GRIN Verlag
Total Pages: 153
Release: 2009-10
Genre: Psychology
ISBN: 3640451600

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Diploma Thesis from the year 2009 in the subject Psychology - Developmental Psychology, grade: 1,3, Johannes Gutenberg University Mainz (Psychologisches Institut), language: English, abstract: Compersion designates empathy and happiness for the partner on a relationship level. Whereas most people can be happy for the partner in a new job which satisfies him/her much more than did the old one, or for the partner meeting a good friend, a lot of people would negate being happy for their own partner finding someone else to love - and doing it. Compersion is often described as the opposite of jealousy, with jealousy being a more common reaction to the partner meeting a new love. The term compersion has been discovered within the American polyamory movement which subcribes to a relationship orientation that includes several intimate, consensual, responsible, and long-term relationships in which all relationship partners know of one another and/or are familiar with each other. In our time, serial monogamy is the most common relationship practice. It includes exclusive relationship rights and agreements. It comes with the cost and benefits of letting the other partner be the "only one" until the next only one comes along or of cheating on the partner, if the love to someone else starts. Usually this new love is suppressed, because it is assumed that the old partners must part ways as soon as someone new comes along. Loving several people at a time is a taboo, which is why polyamorous people often face social marginalisation in everyday life, being treated prejudicially or ostracised. The relation between compersion and jealousy is an often dicussed topic in the polyamorous community as every individual perceives it differently. Therefore, a lot of equally valid and parallel views exist. Some, for instance, have had the experience of compersion replacing jealousy, some see it as a reminder of some deeper propensity in themselves or of their relationship being out of balan


Love's Refraction

Love's Refraction
Author: Jillian Deri
Publisher: University of Toronto Press
Total Pages: 164
Release: 2015-01-01
Genre: Family & Relationships
ISBN: 1442628693

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In Love's Refraction, Jillian Deri explores the distinctive question of how and why polyamorists – people who practice consensual non-monogamy – manage jealousy. Her focus is on the polyamorist concept of “compersion” – taking pleasure in a lover's other romantic and sexual encounters.


Love and Freedom

Love and Freedom
Author: Jorge N. Ferrer
Publisher: Rowman & Littlefield
Total Pages: 213
Release: 2021-06-24
Genre: Philosophy
ISBN: 153815658X

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In Love and Freedom, Jorge Ferrer proposes a paradigm shift in how romantic relationships are conceptualized, a step forward in the evolution of modern relationships. In the same way that the transgender movement surmounted the gender binary, Ferrer defines how a parallel step can—and should—be taken with the relational style binary. This book offers the first systematic discussion of relationship modes beyond monogamy and polyamory, as well as introduces the notion of “relational freedom” as the capability to choose one’s relational style free from biological, psychological, and sociocultural conditionings. To achieve these goals, Ferrer first discusses a number of critical categories—specifically, monopride/polyphobia, and polypride/monophobia—that mediate the contemporary “mono–poly wars,” that is, the predicament of mutual competition among monogamists and polyamorists. The ideological nature of these “mono–poly wars” is demonstrated through a review of available empirical literature on the psychological health and relationship quality of monogamous and polyamorous individuals and couples. Then, after showing how monogamy and polyamory ultimately reinforce each other, Ferrer articulates three relational pathways to living in-between, through, and beyond the mono/poly binary: fluidity, hybridity, and transcendence. Moving beyond that binary opens a fuzzy, liminal, and multivocal relational space that Ferrer calls novogamy. In this groundbreaking book, readers will learn practical tools to not only transform jealousy, but also enhance their relational freedom while being aware of key issues of diversity and social justice. They will also learn novel criteria to evaluate the success of their intimate relationships, and be introduced to a transformed vision of romantic love beyond both monocentrism and emerging polynormativities.


The Jealousy Workbook

The Jealousy Workbook
Author: Kathy Labriola
Publisher: SCB Distributors
Total Pages: 200
Release: 2013-09-13
Genre: Family & Relationships
ISBN: 0937609641

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From the initial stages of trying to agree who can do what with whom, through advanced issues such as coping with logistics and seeking compersion, every relationship sooner or later confronts jealousy – and some relationships do not survive the confrontation. Between these covers you will find forty-two exercises with supporting text, developed by a professional relationship counselor and refined by hundreds of clients trying to find their own paths through jealousy. They range from basic (Exercise Two, Clarify Your Relationship Orientation) through challenging (Exercise Thirty-Four, Imagine Looking Through Their Eyes and Being In Their Shoes). All can be done solo, with a partner, or under the supervision of a helping professional, and all can be done before a problem emerges or in the throes of a jealousy crisis. Along the way, you will find solutions to the issues that bedevil even the most happily open relationships.


The Polyamory Breakup Book

The Polyamory Breakup Book
Author: Kathy Labriola
Publisher: Thorntree Press LLC
Total Pages: 237
Release: 2019-10-04
Genre: Family & Relationships
ISBN: 1944934820

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Polyamory is not always easy. With multiple partners often come more complex relationships to navigate. This practical guide looks at the common causes of polyamorous breakups, identifies strategies to avoid ending relationships, and provides you with the toolkit to survive a breakup. Kathy Labriola uses real life examples and expert insight as a counselor and nurse. From how to handle jealousy to the practicalities of managing money and time with multiple partners, this book includes tips and insights from the polyamory community. It is inevitable that some relationships will end in a breakup. This book helps you maintain friendships and minimize the impact of a breakup on the rest of your polycule and wider community. Unlike traditional breakup guides, Labriola's book offers insight specific to the polyamory community and addresses the unique challenges that come with multiple partners.


The Oxford Handbook of the Philosophy of Love

The Oxford Handbook of the Philosophy of Love
Author: Christopher Grau
Publisher: Oxford University Press
Total Pages: 681
Release: 2024
Genre: Philosophy
ISBN: 0199395721

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The Oxford Handbook of the Philosophy of Love offers a wide array of original essays from leading philosophers on the nature and value of love.


Love In Abundance

Love In Abundance
Author: Kathy Labriola
Publisher: SCB Distributors
Total Pages: 200
Release: 2011-03-28
Genre: Psychology
ISBN: 0937609471

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Beyond the basics of polyamory lies a complex web of negotiations, agreements, pitfalls and rewards. Kathy Labriola, a relationships counselor who has worked for many years with singles, couples and groups in polyamorous and open relationships, sets forth some of the realities of alternative lifestyles: dealing with some of the common relationship-disrupters, managing jealousy, choosing compatible partners, combining BDSM with polyamory, distinguishing between sex addiction and polyamory, and much more.


Compersion

Compersion
Author: Hypatia from Space
Publisher: Independently Published
Total Pages: 284
Release: 2018-05-07
Genre:
ISBN: 9781980465904

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Compersion can be defined as the opposite of jealousy. Hypatia, famous polyamorous blogger and inspirational writer, has intensively focused her research on this feeling somewhat unknown to most people. Through her careful research as well as her personal experience, she has come to the conclusion that compersion is within the reach of every polyamorous individual. However, this feeling of joy towards the happiness of our partners does not happen by chance, or without effort. Her hypothesis: Each polyamorous has specific individual needs that, once fulfilled, allow them to experience a solid and lasting sentiment of compersion. Hypatia warmly invites the reader on a journey of self-discovery to explore their inner selves to see what their essential compersion needs are. She also addresses the fundamental topic of how one can successfully support their partners and metamours in their own journey towards this liberating experience. Last, not least, she evokes the state of mind necessary for those who wish to develop, or integrate more fully, compersion into their lives. Controlling jealousy is great, but cultivating compersion is way better!


Love

Love
Author: Ronald De Sousa
Publisher: Oxford University Press, USA
Total Pages: 153
Release: 2015
Genre: Family & Relationships
ISBN: 019966384X

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Explores the philosophical notion of love, and argues that love is more complex than conventional thought would have us believe.


The Many Faces of Polyamory

The Many Faces of Polyamory
Author: Magdalena J. Fosse
Publisher: Routledge
Total Pages: 277
Release: 2021-05-23
Genre: Family & Relationships
ISBN: 135138113X

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The Many Faces of Polyamory: Longing and Belonging in Concurrent Relationships provides new perspectives on polyamory and the longing to belong in the relatively uncharted territory of nonnormative relationships. This volume offers a valuable and compelling account on how to approach polyamorous relationships from the clinical perspective. While there is no uniform answer, Dr. Fosse’s compassionate and discerning approach that combines relative neutrality, an open-minded embrace of nontraditional lifestyle choices, and skilful attention to countertransference dynamics is likely to be inspiring. Dr. Fosse exposes the dynamics of love, sex, jealousy, and compersion as they play out in lives of those interested in polyamory, and more broadly, consensual nonmonogamy. Her focus is on relationships worth having. With its nuanced clinical focus, The Many Faces of Polyamory will be an essential resource for psychotherapists, educators, students, and anyone inside and outside of the mental health field drawn to the intricacies of sexuality, intimacy, and how they are intertwined with relational satisfaction