Fat Vampire Value Meal Books 1 4 In The Series PDF Download
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Author | : |
Publisher | : |
Total Pages | : |
Release | : 2013 |
Genre | : |
ISBN | : 9781301037131 |
Download Fat Vampire Value Meal (Books 1-4 in the Series) Book in PDF, ePub and Kindle
This collection, for people who read and enjoyed the original "Fat Vampire," contains the entirety of books 1-4 in the series:* Fat Vampire* Fat Vampire 2: Tastes Like Chicken* Fat Vampire 3: All You Can Eat* Fat Vampire 4: Harder Better Fatter Stronger+++++PRAISE FOR FAT VAMPIRE:"Johnny is a phenomenal writer. This book is nothing short of hilarious. I started to read it at work, but had to stop almost immediately because I could not stop myself from laughing out loud.""Humor drips from every orifice of this story which couples well with the hints of gore and danger ever present in vampire literature. I found it very entertaining and I wish I had drawn it out a bit more instead of cashing out in one sitting. Five stars, no regrets.""At Last! An Original Vampire Story! I've read a fair few Vampire tales in recent years, and most are twilight clones, interview clones, or frankly bad fan fiction. This one is the first I've read for a long time that is genuinely original, well written, and also 'keeps to the rules'."+++++DESCRIPTION FOR FAT VAMPIRE (BOOK 1):When overweight treadmill salesman Reginald Baskin finally meets a co-worker who doesn't make fun of him, it's just his own bad luck that tech guy Maurice turns out to be a two thousand-year-old vampire.And when Maurice turns Reginald to save his life, it's just Reginald's own further bad luck that he wakes up to discover he's become the slowest, weakest, most out-of-shape vampire ever born, doomed to "heal" to his corpulent self for all of eternity.As Reginald struggles with the downsides of being a fat vampire -- too slow to catch people to feed on, mocked by those he tries to glamour, assaulted by his intended prey and left for undead -- he discovers in himself rare powers that few vampires have... and just in time too, because the Vampire Council might just want his head for being an inferior representative of their race.Fat Vampire is the story of an unlikely hero who, after having an imperfect eternity shoved into his grease-stained hands, must learn to turn the afterlife's lemons into tasty lemon danishes.+++++ABOUT THE AUTHORJohnny B. Truant is the author of "Unicorn Western" and "The Bialy Pimps" and is one of the co-hosts the popular "Better Off Undead" podcast with "Yesterday's Gone" authors Sean Platt and David Wright. Both Better Off Undead and the trio's Self Publishing Podcast are available on iTunes.
Author | : Adam Rex |
Publisher | : Harper Collins |
Total Pages | : 336 |
Release | : 2011-07-26 |
Genre | : Juvenile Fiction |
ISBN | : 0061920924 |
Download Fat Vampire Book in PDF, ePub and Kindle
Doug Lee is undead quite by accident—attacked by a desperate vampire, he finds himself cursed with being fat and fifteen forever. When he has no luck finding some goth chick with a vampire fetish, he resorts to sucking the blood of cows under cover of the night. But it’s just not the same. Then he meets the new Indian exchange student and falls for her—hard. Yeah, he wants to bite her, but he also wants to prove himself to her. But like the laws of life, love, and high school, the laws of vampire existence are complicated—it’s not as easy as studying Dracula. Especially when the star of Vampire Hunters is hot on your trail in an attempt to boost ratings. . . . Searing, hilarious, and always unexpected, Fat Vampire is a satirical tour de force from one of the most original writers of fiction today.
Author | : Andrew Fox |
Publisher | : Ballantine Books |
Total Pages | : 354 |
Release | : 2003-07-01 |
Genre | : Fiction |
ISBN | : 0345464443 |
Download Fat White Vampire Blues Book in PDF, ePub and Kindle
He’s undead, overweight, and can’t get a date Vampire, nosferatu, creature of the night—whatever you call him—Jules Duchon has lived (so to speak) in New Orleans far longer than there have been drunk coeds on Bourbon Street. Weighing in at a whopping four hundred and fifty pounds, swelled up on the sweet, rich blood of people who consume the fattiest diet in the world, Jules is thankful he can’t see his reflection in a mirror. When he turns into a bat, he can’t get his big ol’ butt off the ground. What’s worse, after more than a century of being undead, he’s watched his neighborhood truly go to hell—and now, a new vampire is looking to drive him out altogether. See, Jules had always been an equal opportunity kind of vampire. And while he would admit that the blood of a black woman is sweeter than the blood of a white man, Jules never drank more than his fair share of either. Enter Malice X . Young, cocky, and black, Malice warns Jules that his days of feasting on sisters and brothers are over. He tells Jules he’d better confine himself to white victims—or else face the consequences. And then, just to prove he isn’t kidding, Malice burns Jules’s house to the ground. With the help of Maureen, the morbidly obese, stripper-vampire who made him, and Doodlebug, an undead cross-dresser who (literally) flies in from the coast—Jules must find a way to contend with the hurdles that life throws at him . . . without getting a stake through the heart. It’s enough to give a man the blues.
Author | : Johnny B Truant |
Publisher | : |
Total Pages | : 0 |
Release | : 2024-04-29 |
Genre | : Fiction |
ISBN | : 9781964578002 |
Download Fat Vampire Book in PDF, ePub and Kindle
When overweight treadmill salesman Reginald Baskin meets a vampire, he wakes to discover he's become the slowest, weakest, most out-of-shape vampire ever created ... doomed to "heal" to his corpulent self for all of eternity.
Author | : Johnny B. Truant |
Publisher | : |
Total Pages | : |
Release | : 2013 |
Genre | : |
ISBN | : |
Download The Fat Vampire Big Fat Box Set Book in PDF, ePub and Kindle
This collection contains ALL SIX BOOKS in the Fat Vampire series: * Fat Vampire * Fat Vampire 2: Tastes Like Chicken * Fat Vampire 3: All You Can Eat * Fat Vampire 4: Harder Better Fatter Stronger * Fat Vampire 5: Fatpocalypse * Fat Vampire 6: Survival of the Fattest DESCRIPTION FOR FAT VAMPIRE (BOOK 1 IN THIS 6-BOOK COLLECTION): When overweight treadmill salesman Reginald Baskin finally meets a co-worker who doesn't make fun of him, it's just his own bad luck that tech guy Maurice turns out to be a two thousand-year-old vampire. And when Maurice turns Reginald to save his life, it's just Reginald's own further bad luck that he wakes up to discover he's become the slowest, weakest, most out-of-shape vampire ever born, doomed to "heal" to his corpulent self for all of eternity. As Reginald struggles with the downsides of being a fat vampire--too slow to catch people to feed on, mocked by those he tries to glamour, assaulted by his intended prey and left for undead--he discovers in himself rare powers that few vampires have... and just in time too, because the Vampire Council might just want his head for being an inferior representative of their race. Fat Vampire is the story of an unlikely hero who, after having an imperfect eternity shoved into his grease-stained hands, must learn to turn the afterlife's lemons into tasty lemon danishes. PRAISE FOR FAT VAMPIRE: "Truly original and a very fun, witty take on the "done to death" vampire story." "If Eric Northman [from True Blood] ever gets staked, Reginald Baskin will be my new favorite vampire." "Got the book just before bed... Next thing I knew it was the wee hours of the night... It was impossible to put down." Fat Vampire is a fresh twist on the tired old undead myth by Johnny B. Truant--author of many bestselling series including Invasion, The Beam, Unicorn Western, The Dream Engine, Robot Proletariat, and more. You can find more about Johnny (including his podcasts and nonfiction work) at SterlingAndStone.net.
Author | : Drusilla Swan |
Publisher | : Drusilla Swan |
Total Pages | : 362 |
Release | : |
Genre | : Fiction |
ISBN | : |
Download Doms of Darkness Boxed Set (The Complete Series: Books 1-4) Book in PDF, ePub and Kindle
4 Novellas This is the complete series. SOLD TO THE MASTER VAMPIRE **A master vampire takes what he wants, when he wants it.** The moment I saw her, I knew I had to have her. The perfect prize. Mine to tame. Mine to pleasure. Mine to protect. A woman I could mold into my future queen. But she's not as helpless as she seems. Will she take her place as my mate? Or will she lead me to my destruction? CAPTURED BY HER VAMPIRE MATE **I've tasted her blood and I'm never letting her go.** A captured witch with the sweetest blood. Trapped in a war between vampire clans. She made a deal with the devil to secure her freedom. She thought she could escape with her life and purity intact. I should have let her go once she fulfilled her end of the bargain. But I've tasted her sweetness. I want more. I'm claiming her and making her mine. Mine forever. MATED BY THE WARRIOR VAMPIRE **A submissive rose that's mine to tame.** For hundreds of years, I was a mercenary, a warrior with no ties to the mortal world. Until I met Rose. A mind cursed by dark magic that can only be healed with pain and pleasure. A firm hand is what she needs. She will obey and beg for discipline. Will I be able to tame her before it's too late? TAMED BY HER VAMPIRE PROTECTOR **She thinks she wants her freedom, but one look and I knew she was mine.** Trapped between the living and the undead, I drifted between two worlds, belonging to neither, with nothing to tie me down. Until I met Meghan. Alone in the world, her past causes her pain. She wants to escape, but I know how to heal her wounds. She is mine to claim. Mine to protect. With the evil forces standing in our way, our moments together are precious. Stolen. Will she accept her place as my mate? Or are we out of time?
Author | : Andy Remic |
Publisher | : Watkins Media Limited |
Total Pages | : 348 |
Release | : 2010-08-31 |
Genre | : Fiction |
ISBN | : 0857660179 |
Download Kell's Legend Book in PDF, ePub and Kindle
Ferocious fantasy from a real-life hardman come to claim the post-Gemmell world. THEY CAME FROM THE NORTH AND THE CITY FELL. It is a time for warriors, a time for heroes. Kell's axe howls out for blood. The land of Falanor has been invaded by an albino army, the Army of Iron. A small group set off to warn the king: Kell, a magnificent and brutal hero; his granddaughter, Nienna and her friend, Katrina; and Saark, the ex-Sword Champion of King Leanoric, disgraced after his affair with the Queen. Fighting their way south, betrayal follows battle, battle follows deviation, and they are attacked from all quarters by deadly warriors, monstrous harvesters who drain blood from their victims to feed their masters. As Falanor comes under heavy attack and invasion, only then does Nienna begin to learn the truth about grandfather Kell -- that he is anything but a hero. Ferocious fantasy from a real-life hardman come to claim the post-Gemmell world. File Under: Epic Fantasy [ A City Besieged | A Dangerous Hero | Bloodsucking Hordes | Sweeping Battles ] E-book ISBN: 978-0-85766-017-6
Author | : S. Hamil |
Publisher | : Frog Haven Press |
Total Pages | : 774 |
Release | : 2022-10-13 |
Genre | : Fiction |
ISBN | : 1955084254 |
Download Golden Vampires of Tuscany, Books 1-4 Book in PDF, ePub and Kindle
Reader Beware! You are about to engage in the risky behavior of being a lover of all things vampire. Love's forbidden dance: Defying fate, unveiling destiny. Discover a world where love defies the supernatural. Join the Monteleone brothers, Golden Vampires, bound by desire for mortal women, as their passionate romances challenge fate itself. Amidst this enchanting tapestry of forbidden love, meet Lionel, a guardian of the enigmatic Dark Vampire clan, duty-bound and stroic, he's torn when his heart clashes with his loyalty as he falls for Phoebe, a Golden virgin he is trusted to protect. As flames of passion flicker in the shadows, these couples battle to shatter ancient barriers, defying an unyeilding law--Dark and Golden Vampires must never mate. With an unbreakable connection, they challenge destiny, unraveling ancient laws and proving that even the supernatural bows to love's might. Find out how each couple comes to realize that Blood Never Lies.And how the impossible can become possible. True love heals everything, and it grows in the gardens of the heart.
Author | : Anne Malcom |
Publisher | : Anne Malcom |
Total Pages | : 411 |
Release | : 2021-03-19 |
Genre | : Fiction |
ISBN | : 1542466164 |
Download Fatal Harmony Book in PDF, ePub and Kindle
I may be the villain of the story, but at least I get a leading role. Evil is a term thrown around history and literature as if it's something so easily definable. A concept to fight against. Evil doesn’t exist. Neither does ‘good.’ Vampires do, though. I just happen to be one. I’ve cruised through the centuries managing to avoid all the wars, supernatural and human, but still going to all the best parties. I would say I avoided bloodshed, but it’s kind of part of the whole ‘vampire’ thing. I’ve lived on the fringes of a society that considered cruelty and sadism favorable character traits for almost five hundred years. Now I'm in the middle of a war that might just put my nonbeating heart in a lot of danger. Battles, I can handle. The impossible attraction between me and the vampire slayer, not to mention the penetrating gaze of the king of our race, on the other hand? I might not get out undead.
Author | : Christin M. Lovell |
Publisher | : |
Total Pages | : |
Release | : 2011 |
Genre | : Vampires |
ISBN | : |
Download Diary of a Vampeen Book in PDF, ePub and Kindle
Imagine living a human charade for fifteen years and never knowing it. Imagine being provided less than a week to learn and accept your family's true heritage before it overtook you. Alexa Jackson, Lexi, is abruptly thrown onto this roller coaster and quickly learns that she can't change fate, regardless of how many lifetimes she is given. She will be transformed into a vampeen on her sixteenth birthday, she will be called upon to fulfill a greater destiny within the dangerous world of vampires, and she will have to risk heartbreak and rejection if she ever wants a chance at love with Kellan, whether she likes it or not.