Yes My Retarded Ass Signed Up PDF Download
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Author | : M!Chael Mayhem |
Publisher | : AuthorHouse |
Total Pages | : 181 |
Release | : 2007-08 |
Genre | : Biography & Autobiography |
ISBN | : 1434326217 |
Download Yes... My Retarded Ass Signed Up Book in PDF, ePub and Kindle
The title for my novel is taken from a scripture verse out of the book of Revelation. The connection is made by relating that verse to Jeffery Lucas, the main character in The Pretender Lamb. Prior to meeting Jessica Thompson, Jeffery spends most of his early life only pretending to be what others expected of him While he was on a Fall vacation in the Smokey Mountains of Tennessee, Jeffery meets and falls in love with Jessica, a school teacher from Madison, Wisconsin. A misunderstanding during the single night they stayed on the summit of Mt. Le Conte leads them into a journey of slopes and grades over the following years of their lives. The hopes and dreams of both Jeffery and Jessica are laid bare as they allow themselves to be completely open with another person for the first time in their lives. Jeffery tells of how he was raised in a small Iowa town and learned at an early age to fend for himself. Jessica tells of how fate had found her still single at thirty, but with a satisfied mind. The Pretender Lamb is a love story bursting at the seams with twists and turns. Its pages are splashed with equal amounts of humor, sadness, faith and hope. Those on both sides of the morality issue will get a chuckle from this story although they may need a good supply of tissues to dab at their tears as well. The Pretender Lamb takes a pass at explaining the experience of dejavu from a Christian point of view. Although the explanation is no more than an opinion, it should provoke some deeper thought on the subject. Anyone who has had heart problems, or known someone that has, will feel a strong tugging at their emotions as they get lost in the lives of Jeffery and Jessica. The Pretender Lamb is a story of failing health and healing, and of broken spirits and those lifted up again.
Author | : S.D. Turner |
Publisher | : Outskirts Press |
Total Pages | : 358 |
Release | : 2020-12-12 |
Genre | : Humor |
ISBN | : 1977230652 |
Download A Soldier's Tale of Combating Hangovers Book in PDF, ePub and Kindle
“This book makes you want more. I simply could not put it down –marvelous storytelling. Aside from being incredibly funny, S.D. Turner honors America’s soldiers past and present. I could easily see A Soldier’s Tale of Combating Hangovers being produced into a miniseries.” ̶ MAJ Donald “Captain Hand-grenade” Vandergriff, MA, RFSA, US Army (Retired) A Soldier’s Tale of Combating Hangovers: Debauchery Before the Internet is hands-down, the laugh-out-loud military guidebook to life in the U.S. Army in the early 1990s. In his debut memoir, author S.D. Turner brilliantly captures the hysterical side of life in the military. A week after his eighteenth birthday, he finds himself at Ft. Knox, Kentucky, training as an armored crewman aboard the M1A1 battle tank. As a new recruit, the story begins with him running from furious drill sergeants and ends with him running from angry 1800-pound bulls in the twisty, cobbled streets of Pamplona, Spain. Ride along as the author precariously finds himself naked, driving a 10-ton Army truck for his first adventure on Germany’s famed autobahn—all with an overzealous audience of French tour buses! Find out what happens to your drunken hero as he starts a beerfest brawl and almost goes to military prison for following his commander’s orders. It’s a non-stop, wild ride down memory lane that will, at times, have you on the edge of your seat or laughing yourself to the floor. It will definitely have you asking your friends and family more questions about their time in the military.
Author | : Paul Bouchard |
Publisher | : iUniverse |
Total Pages | : 245 |
Release | : 2010-08 |
Genre | : Fiction |
ISBN | : 145024033X |
Download Enlistment Book in PDF, ePub and Kindle
It wasn't supposed to be this way. Twenty-six-year-old Jack Boudreau is a struggling stringer reporter out of Bangor, Maine, who suddenly finds himself standing inside a cattle truck with forty other members of his platoon. Forced to enlist in the Army due to financial pressures, Jack heads to basic training in Missouri, with only two duffle bags to keep him company. After completing training as an Army journalist at the Defense Information School, Jack receives orders to report to Fort Leavenworth, Kansas. His new roommate is Specialist Dustin Boros, who has all the qualities of a successful entrepreneur charisma and ambition, endless patience, a willingness to take risks, an eye for talent, and an uncanny knack to schmooze. The only problem is that Boros' business is managing an illegal cash crop of marijuana. When Jack discovers Boros and his cohorts are operating a drug ring, he has no idea that his roommate is creating an elaborate plan to get him kicked out of the Army. In this gripping military thriller, one man must fight to defend his honor amidst corruption and evil and he's under the gun to solve the puzzle before it is too late.
Author | : Racquel Williams |
Publisher | : Urban Renaissance |
Total Pages | : 288 |
Release | : 2016-08-30 |
Genre | : Fiction |
ISBN | : 1622868358 |
Download Your Man Chose Me Book in PDF, ePub and Kindle
Chicks are always screaming, “Leave my man alone!" but in reality, they need to be checking their men. Tiana Caldwell is not falling for that foolery. She lives by the code that if your man wanted you, he would not stray. She doesn't care if the man she is in love with turns out to be her best friend's man. Ayana Beasley has it all wrong. She thinks that good sex and babies will help her hold on to the man she loves. That is, until she realizes that he is in love with another woman. Broken and hurt, Ayana turns to the one person she thinks she can trust: her best sister-friend, Tiana Caldwell. Watch the drama unfold between these two women who share the same bed, share clothes, and eat out of the same pot, as they compete for one man. It's winner takes all, and these ladies are playing for keeps. How will it end? Will they throw away their friendship over a man, or will they both walk away from him?
Author | : William W. Johnstone |
Publisher | : Pinnacle Books |
Total Pages | : 301 |
Release | : 2018-08-28 |
Genre | : Fiction |
ISBN | : 0786040513 |
Download Trigger Warning Book in PDF, ePub and Kindle
From the USA Today–bestselling authors of Stand Your Ground comes the explosive story of a liberal college under siege—and freedom under fire. Former Army Ranger Jake Rivers is not your typical Kelton College student. He is not spoiled, coddled, or ultra-lib like his classmates who sneer at the “soldier boy.” But regardless of his differences with the rest of the student body, he needs an education. And when terror strikes, the school needs Jake. Without warning, the sounds of gunfire plunge the campus into a battle zone. A violent gang of marauders invade the main hall, taking students hostage for ransom. As a veteran and patriot, Jake won’t give in to their demands. But to fight back, he needs to enlist his fellow classmates and school them in the not-so-liberal art of war. This time, the aggression isn’t “micro.” It’s life or death. And only the strong survive.
Author | : William Kent Krueger |
Publisher | : Simon and Schuster |
Total Pages | : 336 |
Release | : 2014-03-04 |
Genre | : Fiction |
ISBN | : 1451645856 |
Download Ordinary Grace Book in PDF, ePub and Kindle
Looking back at a tragic event that occurred during his thirteenth year, Frank Drum explores how a complicated web of secrets, adultery, and betrayal shattered his Methodist family and their small 1961 Minnesota community.
Author | : Craig Alanson |
Publisher | : |
Total Pages | : 299 |
Release | : 2017-11-13 |
Genre | : |
ISBN | : 9781973292418 |
Download Zero Hour Book in PDF, ePub and Kindle
United Nations Special Operations Command sent an elite Expeditionary Force of soldiers and pilots out on a simple recon mission, and somehow along the way they sparked an alien civil war. Now the not-at-all-Merry Band of Pirates is in desperate trouble, again. Their stolen alien starship is falling apart, thousands of lightyears from home. The ancient alien AI they nicknamed 'Skippy' is apparently dead, and even if they can by some miracle revive him, he might never be the same.
Author | : Elle Louise |
Publisher | : Balboa Press |
Total Pages | : 184 |
Release | : 2022-09-13 |
Genre | : Biography & Autobiography |
ISBN | : |
Download ‘Til Times Get Better Book in PDF, ePub and Kindle
Heart wrenching book with triumph over tragedy. Elle found the inner strength and courage to move beyond the devastation that surrounded her. A soul touching read...definitely a 5. -America K. West Palm Beach, FL This book left my heart hurting for Elle and children like her. The family members each hid their own lies and shame... It inspired me to know these same children can become the strength of the world. What we (I) do matters! ... - Jean B. Round Lake, IL From her earliest childhood memories until the age of 17, Elle fought a battle that didn't belong to her but to adults. At 4, she was removed from her parents due to physical abuse...and that was just the beginning. Elle quickly learned how to survive each situation she was given: adoption, foster care, abandonment, sexual, physical, emotional abuse, secrets, and later the search and rejection by her biological father. She was always able to hide under a smile of masks at school. But everything changed the night her father put a gun to her head. That was the defining moment. Elle realized if she didn't take things into her own hands and escape the abuse, she would probably end up dead. This memoir is the true story of Elle’s journey to save her own life and begin a new one. It is an inspiring voyage of relentless courage, self-reliance, and most of all forgiveness. Through her darkest challenges she never lost hope. She found that love and life can still exist if you never give up and remain steadfast in your personal quest for healing. Elle fought being a victim and became a “Survivor.”
Author | : Ben Walter |
Publisher | : |
Total Pages | : 176 |
Release | : 2021-11-11 |
Genre | : Fiction |
ISBN | : 9781922571205 |
Download What Fear Was Book in PDF, ePub and Kindle
From vanishing islands to talking flathead and nightmarish bushfires, Ben Walter's visionary Tasmanian fictions are unique in the landscape of Australian writing. An unemployed man chooses only to apply for jobs advertised in The Economist; a failed mountain expedition is mocked by the dead bodies of past climbers; and a father and son travel urgently to witness the miracle of Lake Pedder emptying. In What Fear Was, Walter combines beautiful, mesmerising writing with surreal discomfort and absurdist hilarity to completely upend the idea of an Australian short story. 'Lyrical and inventive, savage and strange. You've never read anyone like Ben Walter. Total mastery of language and imagery, paired with an unrivalled imagination and immense storytelling chutzpah. The shot in the arm Australian literature has been screaming for.' - Robbie Arnott 'With its unforgettable descriptions of the natural world, and the unsettling things that sometimes take place there, What Fear Was is an extraordinary collection of stories. Deeply strange, beautifully lyrical and intensely moving; no one in Australia writes like Ben Walter. The weird realism of What Fear Was is wholly unique and deeply valuable in contemporary Australian fiction.' - Ryan O'Neill. 'What Fear Was is a darkly funny, surreal and tender collection, wonderfully Tasmanian in its entanglements. You never know where Ben Walter's stories will take you - there are no straight lines here - but it's truly a pleasure to follow his trail.' - Jennifer Mills
Author | : Jason Pargin |
Publisher | : Macmillan |
Total Pages | : 479 |
Release | : 2009-09-29 |
Genre | : Fiction |
ISBN | : 142995678X |
Download John Dies at the End Book in PDF, ePub and Kindle
John Dies at the End is a genre-bending, humorous account of two college drop-outs inadvertently charged with saving their small town--and the world--from a host of supernatural and paranormal invasions. Now a Major Motion Picture. "[Pargin] is like a mash-up of Douglas Adams and Stephen King... 'page-turner' is an understatement." —Don Coscarelli, director, Phantasm I-V, Bubba Ho-tep STOP. You should not have touched this flyer with your bare hands. NO, don't put it down. It's too late. They're watching you. My name is David. My best friend is John. Those names are fake. You might want to change yours. You may not want to know about the things you'll read on these pages, about the sauce, about Korrok, about the invasion, and the future. But it's too late. You touched the book. You're in the game. You're under the eye. The only defense is knowledge. You need to read this book, to the end. Even the part with the bratwurst. Why? You just have to trust me. The important thing is this: The sauce is a drug, and it gives users a window into another dimension. John and I never had the chance to say no. You still do. I'm sorry to have involved you in this, I really am. But as you read about these terrible events and the very dark epoch the world is about to enter as a result, it is crucial you keep one thing in mind: None of this was my fault.